I'm back

Whew. Um. So I kind of went missing for a few months.

Just. Busy.

Our house is on the market, and precluding that was much time spent sorting through belongings and cleaning up storage areas and even whole garages. And cabinets and drawers and any other places I could envision my happy potential home-buyers snooping. But our happy home-buyers haven't found us yet. And so we wait. And have our lives interrupted constantly to stop and make the house presentable in the midst of 4 year old mayhem and a dog with an ugly bed on every floor of the house. So that's, you know, where I've been.

Sami seems so, so grown up to me. To us. Michael and I comment on it all the time. Just like whoa! How'd she get that tall?

She's in official preschool and adores it. She pronounces regularly to anyone that will listen that home days (meaning no school on those days) are just "BORin'." I think we can all imagine how she's coping 4 days into her 19 day Christmas break. Gah.

She's enjoying the wintery cold snap we're in much more than she did last year. She loves having me "bungle" her up so she can go to the park with Daddy when he takes Jazzy out to run each morning. She returns so brightly pink-cheeked that you just want to plop her into a cup of hot chocolate and drink her up.

She's lost most of her mispronounced baby talk. Like, when her teacher finally taught her how to properly say "yellow" instead of "lellow," I'll admit it wrenched my heart a little. But she still assures me she has "sensible" eyes and ears when she spots or hears something I may have missed. I'm sorry. I'm not correcting these. They're too adorable and they'll be gone soon enough without my assistance.

Maybe I cherish them so much because she has a pretty amazing (to me, who has not hung out with 4 year olds previous to my own) vocabulary. When she was but a wee infant I took it upon myself to always answer her questions and to talk to her like I would anyone else. I don't try to be overly complex or anything. But I also don't hesitate to use "big words" if it is required to properly explain a concept. And she uses some really big words in exactly the right way which never fails to amuse me. And humble me to think of the miracle of the human brain to be able to learn like it does even at 4 years old.

She is also strong-willed. The inherent stubbornness abundant in both her father and to somewhat much lesser degree in her mother seems to have multiplied exponentially in her. Good Lord. Trying to work our way through these last months has been the most challenging part of being a mom that I've yet experienced. Tantrums. Hissy-fits. Demands. Call it what you will, but we're still coping with them. And this is from 2 adults who made up their minds early on that they would never give into a tantrum since any sane person knows that only begets more tantrums. Sami? Tantrums? THEY DON'T WORK!. Why oh why do you continue with them? Why? I'm going to be ultra-eccentric when I grow old just to get back at you. So there.

She is so fricking excited for Christmas this year. Thank God for her present & surprise-gifting over-achiever of an aunt supplementing the Christmas presents this year. Times are tough, and a 4 year old shouldn't have to be aware of it at Christmas time. I'm not saying she should have EVERYthing she asks for by any means. And I've been making her gently aware of the cost of buying "things" and trying to explain that's why Momma and Daddy work -- to earn money, etc. And how that all works. But I'm just saying -- having Aunt Bec doing her thing delights more than just Sami. (Thank you, Aunt Bec.)

I feel very humbled and blessed this season. First and foremost for all our good health. I've seen and heard such heartbreaking stories recently -- I can't say it enough. I am so, so thankful for that. And for all of us being together. And after that, really what does much else matter? Anything else dished out to us, somehow working together we'll get through it. With that said, I'm very thankful we both still have our jobs. But I'm smart enough to know that that could change at any time. For now we still have a beautiful house, 2 fairly reliable vehicles, and I only have to be a little careful when grocery-shopping. :-)

There. I've gotten the stopped-writing-for-months- first-entry-back-is-intimidating thing behind me. So let's leave off there.

Long Time, No Write

I've allowed a horrible gap in my posts here, but undaunted I shall simply pick up in the present so as not to delay myself further by trying to cover past ground.

Wow. Last night my dear husband took me on a date. A few weeks ago he surprised me with tickets to Chorus Line, and last night we got to go. It was awesome. Sami's sitter Mewanie (Melanie to most) came by early allowing us to head downtown for dinner and a martini before showtime. The "dinner" part consisted of really bad service and terrible food, but it didn't even bother us much. We had a great table outside on a balmy night where we could people watch, and we amused ourselves dissing our waitress in the long gaps between her visits.

Then on to the show which was absolutely captivating. Now going to any kind of a Broadway-type musical is my absolute premier choice of outings. I usually start crying the minute the opening number swells up out of the orchestra pit... just because I get overwhelmed that I get to be there. It makes me happy. And last night the performances were so good, I swear my eyes watered through the whole thing. I'm such a weiner.

I called home as we left the show and Melanie reported that while Sami was terribly sleepy she kept saying she wasn't. Obviously she was waiting up for us.

When we got home she did her little number whereby she won't talk or acknowledge us for a little bit. I get this in her. What it really reveals is that it is difficult for her to cope with both Mom and Dad being gone. And when we get home she's so relieved that she's kind of overwhelmed and can't face it. Anyway, while a part of her adores Melanie there is the part where she's just not used to not being with one of us. About an hour before Melanie was due, Sami was uncharacteristically sitting down. Just sitting. Not doing anything. Um... she just doesn't do that. I waited. I knew something was coming, when finally she says, "I don't want to talk to Melanie." "Hmmm. Why, Honey?," says I. "I just don't want to talk." I took her on my lap and hugged her and said, "Well okay. But that will be kind of weird, don't you think, since you'll be spending the whole evening with her?" No answer. It was the indication that a pending babysitter night was stressing her out in her own little way.

But she did fine with the whole thing. And then when it was time for bed she asked to sleep in our bed. And then asked me to lie with her. I really wanted to continue my husband-date but something about her pleadings was more pronounced than just the regular "I'm going to whine and fake cry to see if I can manipulate Mom into hanging out with me longer." I stayed and laid down with her, and we cuddled up close--her with one arm thrown rakishly across me as insurance against me sneaking away.

About 15 minutes later, she's all, "I'm ready to go to my own bed."

Sometimes ya just need some Mom time to put everything straight again. I get that.

She says funny stuff

Daddy bought Sami Crayola's Color Explosion thingie, and in it comes a pad on which she outlines lines with a clear marker and colors appear. Then it also includes some glitter pens to add glitter later. But she can only remember them as 'grease.' So she tells me while she's drawing... "Momma? I'll do the lines part now, and then later we'll add grease." Yes indeed, honey. That will look lovely.

Vivaldi

The other night as we were waiting for Michael to come home from work, I was watching the tail end of the Miss American Pageant. I know, I know. Just shut up. Anyway, it was the talent portion. And let me digress for one moment here. I didn't get to see all of the performances, but on the next round of axing some of the girls, Miss Iowa got cut. Now, as she's gracefully departing what should I see? Batons. Batons, people. Did she honestly twirl effing batons as her talent? Pageanteers still do that?! I'm sorry. I thought that went out in the 80s. Or should have. Batons. She deserved to get ousted. Even if I'm partial to Iowa in general.

I'm back now. Anyway, as Michael comes in the door I'm watching Miss So-and-So who was kind of one of those big-boned gals you hear about, balleting about in a less than graceful manner. But it was ballet so it caught Sami's attention for a moment. And I go (and only because it was captioned beneath her), "Oh she's dancing to Vivaldi. Mommy likes Vivaldi."

Sami runs off and throws over her shoulder, "I have Vivaldi!"

Michael and I are chatting a bit, and Sami comes tearing back around the corner and hands me a Vivaldi CD. "See? I have Vivaldi."

I sat there. Trying to grasp.
She can't read.
She has about 40 CDs.
I've never played Vivaldi for her. Let alone played it and identified it as Vivaldi.

Michael said one day a few weeks ago he took that CD to work to listen to on his drive. And she must've seen it and heard him call it Vivaldi.

But she's got crazy recall skills. Or she's secretly taught herself to read but doesn't want to reveal it due to the whole 'read me a bedtime' story ruse she's got working for her.